|Today someone accused me of stealing his idea for the Science Calculator, which was introduced in the latest version of Angel, as he happened to release his own Science Calculator a while ago. He started a thread in the Utopian forums, which filled up very quickly.
My regular users who visit my forums know that the Science Calculator is something I plan to add for a long time, and that only now I got the time for it. Yet, it took me longer than expected since I worked on several projects simultaneously, as I'm so used to do lately.
Eventually we settled our dispute. I understood from him how much he was hurt by thinking that I stole his idea, and I explained to him that I understand how he feels, but he must understand that this feature was in my to-do list for a long time, over a year actually. I would have added it to Angel regardless of his calculator (from which I was unaware until a day before the release of the new Angel).
I have nothing against that person. Frankly, I truly understand how he feels, as I've been in these situations countless of times, with the only difference that people DID copy my good ideas in my case. However, the feeling is the same, and for that I apologize to you (I'm not sure you want me to tell your name).
This false accusation on me, as harsh as it was, did not really hurt me. I've learnt to develop a thick skin in these cases. However, I was deeply hurt by another thing -- the public reaction.
I truly had no idea how much people hate me in Utopia. I knew that not everybody likes me, it's very logical, however I had no idea that I have so many haters. They were talking about boycotting Angel, joining forces againt the common enemy Brother Green, thinking of legal ways to sue me against copyright violations, and that's only the beginning...
Some of them were very friendly to me, calling me in all these nice names: fucking idiot, fucking moron, dumbass arrogant ignorant stupid prick, and this is my favorite: "poor lost soul wandering in the dark void of his stupidity".
BTW: Guardian of War, I really don't know why you hate me so much. You seem to do it with real passion and desire for revenge, however as far as I try to remember, I don't think I even know you, and I can't think of anything I have done to upset you.
When I first started working on Angel (then called UCBF - Utopia Crystal-Ball Formatter) in age 5 (almost 2 years ago!), I did it with love. I wanted to contribute something to the Utopian world, and since then I invested 100% of me in this project. I was breathing Utopia, eating Utopia, sleeping Utopia, you name it.
This incident has made me think and reconsider my future plans and projects, up to the Utopia Angel and Utopia Temple levels. If so many people hate me after everything I've done, maybe I've done something wrong along the way, and I should stop. Becoming the #1 hated person in Utopia was not the purpose of my quest.
I would also like to tell you a little secret. Recently I have been hospitalized due to a lung problem. That's why I haven't been so active until last week. Stress is one of the catalyst of the problem I had, and let me tell you that I'm in a constant state of stress because of my Utopian projects. Therefore I ask you, why do I need it? Why do I need to endanger my health for a work that people don't appreciate, and even hate me for it? I feel like I've became the person who people love to hate. What happened in that forum was a pure which-hunt. People didn't need a true reason to flame me, they did it just because they could, and they enjoyed it. And that's what really hurt me.
As for now, I'm putting all my ongoing projects on hold. I need some time to reconsider my future in Utopia.
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